Peter (rubberband45) wrote in screenplayery,

I originally wrote this an a story within a movie that i was writing.  But now I really like it seperatly.  I would very much appreciate feedback.  It's very short.


George, Owen, and Sean are all sitting around Jeremy's basement.
No one is talking very much.
 It's a hell of a thing what's happening to Ryan,
 wouldn't you say?
 Yeah, It's terrible.
 I wish that I had known him better.
 I wonder what he was thinking-
 I don't know.
 It's a hell of a thing though.
 Yeah it is.
Jeremy walks into the room.
 So, I suppose that none of you know why I invited you
 Being your brother isn't enough of a reason?
 Of course it is. But I have a better reason.
 Ok then.
 As you know, a few days ago, our cousin, and Sean's
 brother was sentenced to the death penalty. He is
 currently on death row.
 That's generally what happens when you're sentenced to
 Anyway, it is my purpose and I hope it will soon become
 the purpose of you all, to get him out of this
 Oh gosh.
 We need to break him out of jail.
 Ok, first off- that's impossible. Secondly, he's in
 jail for a reason.
 Why exactly is he in jail? I never heard the full
 You don't know why you're own twin brother is being
 I barely even know him. We didn't grow up in the same
 place. I only saw him a few times in my life. We're
 only brothers by having the same parents. And we we
 born together.
 Well then. Let me tell you why your brother was
 sentenced to death. And you can tell me if it's right
 or wrong. Around a year ago, your brother decided that
 he needed to get a job. However, he had no experiences
 or references whatsoever, so this was difficult for
 him. So he took to shoplifting from a department store
 that had turned him down and returning the spoils. He
 considered this to be his 'job'. Eventually, after half
 a year of this, they got a higher security system that
 made this impossible. But your brother was never one to
 give up, so he began to rob the store. And since he had
 acquired a rather frill filled life style than he felt
 that he needed to keep up, he had to rob the store
 often. Once a week. Every friday. Not a bad job- one
 hour every seven days. Of course, due to this routine,
 they began to expect his visits so they began taking
 steps to apprehend him. At first they put up cameras-
 so he shot the cameras, then they started putting a cop
 in the store, so he shot the cop, then they started
 putting in more and more cops, so he'd come in with
 more and more guns, clean all of the cops out of the
 place and then rob it. So after a few weeks of this
 they realized that it wasn't working and set up an
 ambush. All of the police hid among the coats in the
 men's outerwear department and your brother walked in
 thinking that they must have forgotten about him for
 that day. Then the bullets started flying.
He pauses.
 Kid, your brother's on death row for killing eleven
 cops, four cashiers, and eighteen hostages/civilians.
Another pause.
 Just that day.
Another pause.
 Do you think that they charged him right?
 Are they sure that it was him?
 Positive. He forgot about the cameras.
 So my question to you Jeremy, is why on earth, you
 would want to let a scumbag like that out onto the
 It's not for him?
 Ooh, who's it for? Who's idea was this?
 His grandmother. She raised him and she did the best
 that she could. he was practically her son. And she's
 old. To kill him...
 They're not punishing him. They're punishing him. He
 won't even know that he's dead. It'll just be over. But
 her, she'll always have to live with the loss of the
 most important person in the world to her. And she
 can't do that. That's not right. Now, if it was just
 life in jail that'd be different. She could still visit
 him. But she can't do this. We can't let them do this.
 Now, who's with me?
 Jeremy, you're talking about letting about letting
 practically- a serial killer out of jail.
 He's not that bad of a guy. He lent me money once.
 I hope that you paid him back on time.
 How hard would this be? I'm not risking my ass over
 It wouldn't really be that difficult. I have it all
 figured out. There'd be a little risk of course. But it
 wouldn't be too bad. You'd have probably a ninety
 percent chance of getting out with no problems.
 Alright then. I'm in.
 Great. Sean you in?
 Really though, i don't know. I barely even know who i'd
 be saving. I've barely seen him at all. And yet I wish
 that I could have gotten to know him better. I almost
 feel guilty about it. Like I owe him something. You
 know what- count me in!
 Alright! Now george, what's it going to take?
 You're all ridiculous. He's killed over thirty people.
 That is insane.
 He's our cousin.
 So? i don't care. A cousin of mine wouldn't go on a
 kill-crazy rampage like that.
 Don't do it for him. Do it for grandma. Do you have any
 idea how she's going to feel?
 Don't start that guilt trip crap with me.
 She'll become depressed, possibly suicidal.
 Shut up.
 Do you want that on your conscience?
 So, you in?
 Yes. I guess that I'm in.
 Excellent. So here's the plan...

Ryan is sitting at a table in an orange jumpsuits. In the room
there are eight tables like the one that he's at. It's a visiting
center. There are around five guards in the room. Sean walks in
wearing a trenchcoat. He sits down across the table from Ryan.
 Hey. You look like me! Who are you?
 I'm your twin brother. You don't remember me?
 Shit man. I remember that you exist, I just don't
 remember you.
 Well, I'm sorry.
 So you're coming back to pay your respects to a man
 who's about to die. Can't make it to the funeral?
 Well, it would be inconvenient for me. I've had plans
 for about a month to move out of the country in a few
 days. But that's not why I'm here.
 Oh. Why are you here then?
 I'm getting you out of here.
 Really. And how are you going to do this?
 Well, it's actually very clever. Your cousin Jeremy
 came up with it. You see, under this trench coat I'm
 wearing a prison uniform exactly identical to the one
 that you're wearing. So, on the count of three, in a
 split second, I'll take off the coat, leave it on the
 chair, we'll switch places, and you'll put on the coat.
 Then we'll say that the meeting's over and you'll get
 up and leave. They'll take me back to your cell. Then
 in an hour or so, I'll tell them what we did, for proof
 you have a tattoo on your arm that I don't, and they'll
 have to let me go. You'll be free. Isn't that
 I suppose that it's worth a shot.
 Alright then. Let's go. One, two and THREE!
On three the two do exactly what Ryan said. In one second they've
changed places and are unable to be told apart.
 Hey guard. My brother was just leaving.
 Stop acting like such a fruit, they'll know that you're
 not me.
A guard escorts Sean to Ryan's cell. Another one escorts Ryan
out. Ryan leaves the prison and starts to walk through the
parking lot. Jeremy yells to him from George's car.
 Hey, Ryan over here!
Ryan goes over to the car and gets in. Jeremy is driving, Owen is
in the passenger's seat and George and Ryan are in the back.
Jeremy starts to drive away.
 Wait. Stop the car!
 What is it Ryan?
 I want shotgun.
 Well, me too and I was here first.
 Well fuck you. I've been in jail.
 Owen, just let him have the seat.
 Ah, screw you guys.
Owen gets out of the seat and gets in the back. Ryan crawls into
the passenger's seat. Jeremy starts the car and they drive away.
 So, what was it like in there?
 It was tons of fun.
 Oh, I see that you're still feeling pretty sarcastic.
 It's probably because of that prison food. Well, we'll
 get you over to grandma's in no time and she'll get you
 a hot meal.
Ryan rolls his eyes.
 Whoop dee doo.
They drive into the suburbs.
 Stop the car.
Jeremy stops.
 What's wrong?
 I just have to pick something up from this house real
 quick. I'll only be gone for a second. Pop the trunk.
Jeremy pops the trunk. Ryan gets out of the car and walks up to
the house. He walks right in the door without knocking.
He walks out carrying a screaming five year old. He puts the kid
in the trunk, slams it down, and gets back into the car.
 Alright drive! Go!
 What? What was that?
 What the hell is going on here?
 Just go, I'll explain it later.
 Well, okay.
Jeremy starts the car and they drive away.
 Okay, now what's going on? What the fuck do you think
 that you're doing?
 Hey, Jeremy, want to tell your brother to shut his
 mouth before he gets hurt.
 George, calm down. Now Ryan, what's going on?
 At my trial I swore to the Judge that if I was
 convicted and I ever got out- that I'd get revenge on
 him. And now, what kind of person would I be if I
 didn't keep my promises?
 That was your Judge's house?
 Yep. And that's his brat in the back seat. I've got it
 all planned out. In a few days the honorable judge
 Miller will get a very big package shipped to his
 house. Unfortunately the contents will be somewhat
 damaged, and not due to shipping. Oh, the look on his
 face when he sees his child's guts spill out-
 Ok, stop the car!
 Well, geez, that might be a little rash.
 We are returning this man to the jail. He is insane.
 We're being followed by the police!
 That wimp-ass brother of mine probably caved and told
 them everything.
 Oh, great, we can do the exchange right here.
 Hurry up!
 They're in front of us too.
Jeremy stops the car. They're on the middle of a bridge. Police
are approaching from both sides.
 Jeremy, give me the wheel I'm going to move this car.
 See, that, i don't know, doesn't really sound like a
 good idea.
Ryan lunges at him.
 Give me the wheel.
George throws Ryan out of the car and runs up to him. Ryan puts
george in a headlock, punches him, an throws him off of the
 Oh my god.
Owen gets out of the car.
 You're going to pay for that!
The police close in on them. Ryan grabs Owen, jumps onto the
railing, and dangles him off of the bridge. He yells to the
 If any one of you fucking pigs even moves, I swear I
 will throw him off of this bridge!
The police slowly begin to move.
 What? What? You don't think that I will? Okay then.
Ryan throws Owen off of the bridge and grabs the kid out of the
trunk. The kid is quickly in owen's former position.
 Yeah, that's right. he just died because of you? Do you
 want that to happen to him? Last time it took you
 fuckers two SWAT teams to bring me down! You haven't
 got half that number today! So, just back the fuck off.
 I'm Ryan Carter and no one fucking messes with me!! No
Jeremy, staying close to the ground, crawls out of the car and
moves to where Ryan is standing. Jeremy slowly gets into a
crouching position right underneath Ryan. A policeman puts a hand
on his gun.
 Okay then.
Ryan turns and throws the kid off of the bridge. Jeremy jumps
onto Ryan and the two of them fall off of the bridge and onto the
sharp rocks under it.

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